The Egg

I may have mentioned before, but my short time in South Africa has really piqued my interest in ostriches. They are amusing, alien-like birds that are a continuous source of fascination. This week I had ostriches on my mind yet again.

Shannon, through her internship, dined with some government officials last week. As a parting gift she was given a decorative ostrich egg, bearing the emblem of the South African government.

Or, at least, she thought it was a decorative egg.

Upon closer inspection when she returned home, she discovered the egg made a juicy sound when shaken. It had not been hollowed-out before being decorated. It was just an enormous, fresh egg.

Graham had heard that ostrich eggs were known for their amazing strength. If dropped--Graham thought--an ostrich egg would not break. Graham was incorrect. He dropped Shannon's egg and it cracked and began oozing a thick liquid.

Alarmed, Shannon refrigerated the cracked egg, but a day later we had all grown curious and concerned about it. Seeing no other alternative, we assembled in Shannon's room to finish the deed and cook the egg.

Graham was partially correct in his assumptions about the egg's strength; cracking the egg all the way open took some force. The shell was about as dense as a china teacup. Upon cracking the egg we all screamed twice--the first time, upon seeing the weird, leathery membrane separating the shell from the gooey insides, and the second time when we saw the yolk, which was deep yellow in color and bigger than a grapefruit--kind of the stuff of nightmares for an ex-vegan like myself.

I learned on our safari adventure a few weeks ago that cooking an ostrich egg is equivalent to cooking two dozen chicken eggs at once. We can attest to this. Shannon would have needed a huge wok to cook the egg's contents properly--even in her largest frying pan, the scramble was almost overflowing. It also took a long time to cook.

In the end, the scrambled ostrich egg filled an entire serving bowl.

Our error was that we conducted this experiment right after dinner and were all too full to really enjoy much of this army-sized egg portion.

Now that I know what to expect, I'll plan on feeding an entire banquet the next time I have access to one of these things. Another valuable lesson learned.